Frankly, I don’t know where to start.
While having private matters in the public spotlight has become more the norm these days between “YouTuber’s” and podcasts – which I love – things become a lot more blurry when it’s YOUR life. Ideally I wouldn’t be commenting on this, but the nature of Inside Sim Racing and weekly shows has me wanting to provide an explanation for the lack of content. And while a video would be one avenue to do so, it’s much easier right now to write about it and move on.
On Monday April 17, 2017 my mom Tracy Sabol passed away at the age of 52 from a rare form of cancer.
I could go on and on about how amazing my mom is and how hard she has fought, but I think my dad – who is a saint – beautifully captured it here.
I am deeply saddened to announce the passing of Tracy. She passed peacefully during a short nap Monday morning following a 6 month battle with the rare Urachal Cancer. Never giving up hope and with determination to the end Tracy enjoyed a pain free Easter with family.
An inspiration to all of us and specifically me I cannot say fully the agony felt by losing someone that I admired and loved most in the world. I recently read, “You have family, you have children, but out of everyone in the world you choose your spouse”. It is a special bond that each vowed “to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.” The feelings couldn’t be better said..! I can honestly say, after spending nearly every minute of the past 6 months with Tracy, there is nowhere else I would have rather been.
After 30 years together, raising a family and watching the youngest set out on her journey and looking forward to the next 30 years together to get news of stage 4 of a rare cancer soon after is devastating. Most would crumble at the outlook, but Tracy got determined not to lose that dream of the future so easily. Over the months, she has showed a strength that few have, but known by those close to her. Always surprising people with her attitude, activeness, and the concern of others it just represented who she is/was (so hard to use past tense). Walking on her own, even the morning right before passing just has me think, “yep, that’s Tracy”, on the move.
Tracy will be greatly missed. We, her family (John Sabol, Thomas Sabol, Amanda Sabol and soon to be Angela Perkins), and hopefully all who knew her will fondly take forward in our lives her compassion, drive, determination, and lovingness. Let us never forget her beauty both inside and out. We must take better care of ourselves with eating good foods, exercise, and love each other.
A special thanks to all those who have been in contact with Tracy over the past month as it has meant a lot to her. Thank you to everyone who donated to her cause on Medgift as the out of pocket expenses has been great. Additionally thanks to those who have assisted in this battle.
Services are being arranged for Monday evening. More information to follow.
Please feel free to share this message and Tracy.
David Sabol, Loving Husband
I hope you were able to take something away from my dad’s message. Even just the part at the end about taking care of ourselves and loving others. It’s easy to get sucked into an online community – like sim racing – and be mean to a person you’ll probably never meet, or hole-up from the outside world and not take care of yourself. I’ve done it.
But I think we can all be better. Be more like my mom.
My mom’s cancer battle has and will affect me getting content out for Inside Sim Racing. Shows in the past have been cancelled because I needed to spend time with her, and many others just haven’t made it out because – in-hindsight – I now realize I’ve been struggling a lot these past few months.
I assumed my mental haziness and lack of motivation had something to do with my mom’s illness, but I didn’t realize how much it was weighing me down. And while I miss my mom, I am relieved that she isn’t in pain anymore, and that has lifted a big burden off my back.
In an ideal world I would get through this week, and the funeral on Monday, and be back to making videos for you guys, but that’s not exactly how it is going to go. Yes I will be trying to get back to videos but I have another life event coming up, my wedding.
Angela and I are getting married on May 1st, then we are heading Italy for our honeymoon a week later and will be traveling all over the beautiful country for a couple weeks. I hate being away from Inside Sim Racing for so long, but you only get one chance to honeymoon so I decided to be a bit selfish.
So yea, things might be a bit spotty the next month, but I’m hoping to comeback a lot stronger.
Back to my mom, I want to deeply thank those of you who contributed to her MedGift page. I made the – again, awkward – call and asked for help from you guys at the end of one of our Wheel Buyer’s Guide videos and you came through. My family was blown away by your generosity. I only kept the part about my mom on the video for a week because I didn’t want the video to always be about my mom’s cancer (it’s now on my personal channel), but a lot of you got to see it and you delivered.
I also want to thank Darin for how supportive he’s been during this process. Not only for the understanding he’s shown recently as things started looking bleak but just allowing me to take the company back to Ohio with me, which turned into a huge blessing by allowing me to be around my family.
I also want to apologize – for lack of a better word – to those companies that I haven’t been able to get videos out showcasing their products and to companies/individuals who I haven’t been able to respond to via email. Like I said earlier, things have been tougher than I knew and a lot of things just haven’t gotten done.
And to everyone else, and particularly the fans who show up week-in and week-out, thank you for your understanding.
-John
My mom went 180 mph in a two-seater Indycar around Charlotte in open toe shoes!
